Family

Through the stories of kids and parents in the middle school trenches, a New York Times bestselling author reveals why these years are so painful, how parents unwittingly make them worse, and what we all need to do to grow up.

"Judith Warner brilliantly challenges the assumption that middle school has to be a chalkboard jungle."--Peggy Orenstein, author of Boys & Sex and Girls & Sex

The French have a name for the uniquely hellish years between elementary school and high school: l'âge ingrat, or "the ugly age." Characterized by a perfect storm of developmental changes--physical, psychological, and social--the middle school years are a time of great distress for children and parents alike, marked by hurt, isolation, exclusion, competition, anxiety, and often outright cruelty. Some of this is inevitable; there are intrinsic challenges to early adolescence. But these years are harder than they need to be, and Judith Warner believes that adults are complicit.

With deep insight and compassion, Warner walks us through a new understanding of the role that middle school plays in all our lives. She argues that today's helicopter parents are overly concerned with status and achievement--in some ways a residual effect of their own middle school experiences--and that this worsens the self-consciousness, self-absorption, and social "sorting" so typical of early adolescence.

Tracing a century of research on middle childhood and bringing together the voices of social scientists, psychologists, educators, and parents, Warner's book shows how adults can be moral role models for children, making them more empathetic, caring, and resilient. She encourages us to start treating middle schoolers as the complex people they are, holding them to high standards of kindness, and helping them see one another as more than "jocks and mean girls, nerds and sluts."

Part cultural critique and part call to action, this essential book unpacks one of life's most formative periods and shows how we can help our children not only survive it but thrive.

The author of the groundbreaking New York Times bestsellers Girls & Sex and Cinderella Ate My Daughter now turns her focus to the sexual lives of young men, once again offering "both an examination of sexual culture and a guide on how to improve it" (Washington Post).

Peggy Orenstein's Girls & Sex broke ground, shattered taboos, and launched conversations about young women's right to pleasure and agency in sexual encounters. It also had an unexpected effect on its author: Orenstein realized that talking about girls is only half the conversation. Boys are subject to the same cultural forces as girls--steeped in the same distorted media images and binary stereotypes of female sexiness and toxic masculinity--which equally affect how they navigate sexual and emotional relationships. In Boys & Sex, Peggy Orenstein dives back into the lives of young people to once again give voice to the unspoken, revealing how young men understand and negotiate the new rules of physical and emotional intimacy.

Drawing on comprehensive interviews with young men, psychologists, academics, and experts in the field, Boys & Sex dissects so-called locker room talk; how the word "hilarious" robs boys of empathy; pornography as the new sex education; boys' understanding of hookup culture and consent; and their experience as both victims and perpetrators of sexual violence. By surfacing young men's experience in all its complexity, Orenstein is able to unravel the hidden truths, hard lessons, and important realities of young male sexuality in today's world. The result is a provocative and paradigm-shifting work that offers a much-needed vision of how boys can truly move forward as better men.

From the author of the bestselling The Reason I Jump, an extraordinary self-portrait of a young adult with autism

"Essential reading for parents and teachers of those with autism who remain nonverbal."--Temple Grandin

Naoki Higashida was only thirteen when he wrote The Reason I Jump, a revelatory account of autism from the inside by a nonverbal Japanese child, which became an international success. Now, in Fall Down 7 Times Get Up 8, he shares his thoughts and experiences as a young man living each day with severe autism. In short, powerful chapters, Higashida explores school memories, family relationships, the exhilaration of travel, and the difficulties of speech. He also allows readers to experience profound moments we take for granted, like the thought-steps necessary for him to register that it's raining outside. Acutely aware of how strange his behavior can appear to others, he aims throughout to foster a better understanding of autism and to encourage society to see people with disabilities as people, not as problems.

With an introduction by the bestselling novelist David Mitchell, Fall Down 7 Times Get Up 8 also includes a dreamlike short story Higashida wrote especially for the U.S. edition. Both moving and of practical use, this book opens a window into the mind of an inspiring young man who meets every challenge with tenacity and good humor. However often he falls down, he always gets back up.

Praise for Fall Down 7 Times Get Up 8

"[Naoki Higashida's] success as a writer now transcends his diagnosis. . . . His relative isolation--with words as his primary connection to the outside world--has allowed him to fully develop the powers of observation that are necessary for good writing, and he has developed rich, deep perspectives on ideas that many take for granted. . . . The diversity of Higashida's writing, in both subject and style, fits together like a jigsaw puzzle of life put in place with humor and thoughtfulness."--The Japan Times

"Profound insights about what the struggle of living with autism is really like . . . Once again, the invitation to step inside Higashida's mind is irresistible."--London Evening Standard

"Naoki Higashida's lyrical and heartfelt account of his condition is a gift to anyone involved with the same challenges. . . . Higashida shows a delicate regard for the difficulties his condition creates . . . and is adept at explaining his experiences in language that makes sense to neurotypicals."--The Guardian

Nautilus Gold Award Winner: Parenting & Family

A practical guide to understanding teens from bestselling author and global youth advocate Josh Shipp.

In 2015, Harvard researchers found that every child who does well in the face of adversity has had at least one stable and committed relationship with a supportive adult. But Josh Shipp didn't need Harvard to know that. Once an at-risk foster kid, he was headed straight for trouble until he met the man who changed his life: Rodney, the foster parent who refused to quit on Shipp and got him to believe in himself.

Now, in The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans, Shipp shows all of us how to be that caring adult in a teenager's life. Stressing the need for compassion, trust, and encouragement, he breaks down the phases of a teenage human from sixth to twelfth grade, examining the changes, goals, and mentality of teenagers at each stage.

Shipp offers revelatory stories that take us inside the teen brain, and shares wisdom from top professionals and the most expert grown-ups. He also includes practice scripts that address tough issues, including:

FORGIVENESS: What do I do when a teen has been really hurt by someone and it's not their fault?

COMMUNICATION: How do I get a teen to talk to me? They just grunt.

TRUST: My teen blew it. My trust is gone. Where do we go from here?

BULLYING: Help! A teen (or their friend) is being harassed.

DIFFICULT AND AWKWARD CONVERSATIONS: Drugs. Death. Sex. Oh my.

Written in Shipp's playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words--as Shipp reminds us, it's about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive.

And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.

--Kimberly Allen, PhD, Department of Youth, Family, and Community Sciences at North Carolina State University

The Godmother of Silicon Valley, legendary teacher, and mother of a Super Family shares her tried-and-tested methods for raising happy, healthy, successful children using Trust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration, and Kindness: TRICK.

Esther Wojcicki--"Woj" to her many friends and admirers--is famous for three things: teaching a high school class that has changed the lives of thousands of kids, inspiring Silicon Valley legends like Steve Jobs, and raising three daughters who have each become famously successful. What do these three accomplishments have in common? They're the result of TRICK, Woj's secret to raising successful people: Trust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration, and Kindness. Simple lessons, but the results are radical.

Wojcicki's methods are the opposite of helicopter parenting. As we face an epidemic of parental anxiety, Woj is here to say: relax. Talk to infants as if they are adults. Allow teenagers to pick projects that relate to the real world and their own passions, and let them figure out how to complete them. Above all, let your child lead. How to Raise Successful People offers essential lessons for raising, educating, and managing people to their highest potential. Change your parenting, change the world.

This is the tough love that boys need to hear today: a candid and whipsmart guide to being a good guy in a world full of assh*les.

In this frank, funny, and necessary guidebook, Kara Kinney Cartwright, a mom who has raised two teenage boys, compiles all the unwritten rules of being a good guy. As it turns out, everyone needs to learn one major lesson to safely avoid assh*le territory: other people are also humans. (Whoa, right?)

Just Don't Be an Assh*le contains everything young men need to know to have positive interactions, make the best decisions, and recognize when they're being jerks. Things like,

Just don't be an assh*le:

- To your family (parents are not your employees)
- To your friends (they'll laugh at you, not with you)
- At work (no one wants to hear your podcast idea)
- To women ("Are you up?" doesn't qualify as romance)
- Online (if you wouldn't do it in real life, don't do it)
- In the world (people unlike you are also people)
- To yourself (it's okay not to have all the answers)

"My home is green enough to be healthy but chill enough to be happy." --Leah Segedie, Green Enough

In an era of online mom-shaming, Carissa Bonham likes to keep things authentic when discussing the struggles of modern motherhood. One popular meme shared on Carissa's website, Creative Green Living, says "Some days I make beautiful dinners from scratch. Today my kids had cereal and ice cream for dinner. At least it was organic." This is motherhood today.

Carissa's charming mix of inspirational and aspirational quotes mixed with real-life mom moments will make The Little Green Book of Mothers' Wisdom both encouraging and inspirational for moms of all ages, including millennial and Gen X mothers. Explore the journey of motherhood, the life-giving power of mothers, mom instincts, and cultural parenting through the quotes on these pages. Receive advice from crunchy moms, mothers of differently wired kids, and mothers of teens and adult children.

This charming mix of inspiration and aspirational quotes mixed with a dash of reality about modern motherhood has something for every mom.

"Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation." ―Robert A. Heinlein, Have Space Suit--Will Travel

"Having a child flips your concept of love upside down into new depths, otherwise unknown to the human heart." ―Julieanne O'Connor

"By loving them for more than their abilities we show our children that they are much more than the sum of their accomplishments." ― Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Smart Parenting for Smart Kids

The Opposite of COMBAT bridges the disciplines of child development and parent education with mediation, bringing parents and caregivers the knowledge and skills necessary to help children of all ages navigate their own conflicts, collaborate to solve their own problems, deepen their sibling relationships, and develop trust and confidence in their decision-making abilities.

Written by mediator and parent educator Susan North, this book helps parents resolve sibling disputes using time-honored conflict resolution techniques. Parents and caregivers will learn a step-by-step protocol, enlivened by real-world conflict scenarios. Included are tips for making mediation work, as well as commonsense tools for improving everyday family communication.

In this book, parents and caregivers will learn:

To think of conflict in a new way

To help kids manage strong feelings effectively

To guide siblings toward peaceful conflict resolution

Empower siblings with the skills to be life-long collaborators, problem-solvers, and independent thinkers.

The New York Times bestselling author of The Price of Privilege and Teach Your Children Well explores how today's parenting techniques and our myopic educational system are failing to prepare children for their certain-to-be-uncertain future--and how we can reverse course to ensure their lasting adaptability, resilience, health and happiness.

In The Price of Privilege, respected clinician, Madeline Levine was the first to correctly identify the deficits created by parents giving kids of privilege too much of the wrong things and not enough of the right things. Continuing to address the mistaken notions about what children need to thrive in Teach Your Children Well, Levine tore down the myth that good grades, high test scores, and college acceptances should define the parenting endgame. In Ready or Not, she continues the discussion, showing how these same parenting practices, combined with a desperate need to shelter children from discomfort and anxiety, are setting future generations up to fail spectacularly.

Increasingly, the world we know has become disturbing, unfamiliar, and even threatening. In the wake of uncertainty and rapid change, adults are doubling-down on the pressure-filled parenting style that pushes children to excel. Yet these daunting expectations, combined with the stress parents feel and unwittingly project onto their children, are leading to a generation of young people who are overwhelmed, exhausted, distressed--and unprepared for the future that awaits them. While these damaging effects are known, the world into which these children are coming of age is not. And continuing to focus primarily on grades and performance are leaving kids more ill-prepared than ever to navigate the challenges to come.

But there is hope. Using the latest developments in neuroscience and epigenetics (the intersection of genetics and environment), as well as extensive research gleaned from captains of industry, entrepreneurs, military leaders, scientists, academics, and futurists, Levine identifies the skills that children need to succeed in a tumultuous future: adaptability, mental agility, curiosity, collaboration, tolerance for failure, resilience, and optimism. Most important, Levine offers day-to-day solutions parents can use to raise kids who are prepared, enthusiastic, and ready to face an unknown future with confidence and optimism.

This pocket-sized parenting guide for moms and moms-to-be is perfect for a baby shower or Mother's Day gift.

This little handbook is filled with all the secrets and strategies a smart mother needs to know. Featuring tips for mastering quick and easy meals, suggestions for baby-proofing like an expert, advice on stocking your medicine cabinet, tricks to making a long wait fun, and much, much more, such as:

- How to Swaddle a Baby
- Fourteen Birthday-Party Survival Tips
- The Truth about Potty Training
- The Miracle of White Noise
- Comebacks for Unsolicited Parenting Advice

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER - An award-winning guide to the sometimes erratic and confusing behavior of teenage girls that explains what's going on, prepares parents for what's to come, and lets them know when it's time to worry.

Look for Under Pressure, the companion guide to coping with stress and anxiety among girls, available now.

In this sane, highly engaging, and informed guide for parents of daughters, Dr. Damour draws on decades of experience and the latest research to reveal the seven distinct--and absolutely normal--developmental transitions that turn girls into grown-ups, including Parting with Childhood, Contending with Adult Authority, Entering the Romantic World, and Caring for Herself. Providing realistic scenarios and welcome advice on how to engage daughters in smart, constructive ways, Untangled gives parents a broad framework for understanding their daughters while addressing their most common questions, including

- My thirteen-year-old rolls her eyes when I try to talk to her, and only does it more when I get angry with her about it. How should I respond?
- Do I tell my teen daughter that I'm checking her phone?
- My daughter suffers from test anxiety. What can I do to help her?
- Where's the line between healthy eating and having an eating disorder?
- My teenage daughter wants to know why I'm against pot when it's legal in some states. What should I say?
- My daughter's friend is cutting herself. Do I call the girl's mother to let her know?

Perhaps most important, Untangled helps mothers and fathers understand, connect, and grow with their daughters. When parents know what makes their daughter tick, they can embrace and enjoy the challenge of raising a healthy, happy young woman.

BOOKS FOR A BETTER LIFE AWARD WINNER

"Finally, there's some good news for puzzled parents of adolescent girls, and psychologist Lisa Damour is the bearer of that happy news. [Untangled] is the most down-to-earth, readable parenting book I've come across in a long time."--The Washington Post

"Anna Freud wrote in 1958, 'There are few situations in life which are more difficult to cope with than an adolescent son or daughter during the attempt to liberate themselves.' In the intervening decades, the transition doesn't appear to have gotten any easier which makes Untangled such a welcome new resource."--The Boston Globe